Written by LineStar contributor, combat sports enthusiast, and practitioner, Chris Guy. Instagram: @therealsethgeko | Twitter: @DadHallOfFamer

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Main Card 

Alex Perez (+155) vs. Tatsuro Taira (-185)

Perez: DK: $7.6k | Taira: DK:$8.6k

"Buffalo Soldier, in the heart of America. Stolen from Africa, brought it to America...” These days, Alex Perez has a problem: 

“Alex! Jesus, Alex! Your Balls!” 

“I know, knocking out a top ten contender on short notice. Pretty sweet, huh?” 

“No, I mean your actual balls!” 

His balls are too big. Unlike Derrick Lewis’s balls (which are too hot), Perez’s are too big – too big to navigate around town without the aid of a six cubic foot True Temper wheelbarrow to haul them and too big to fit through the average doorway without removing the door entirely from its frame. You see, it wasn’t long ago when Alex Perez was a deadbeat fighter, court ordered to pay fighter’s support to all the potential opponents whose fights he pulled out of. But on some Freaky Friday type-shit, Perez switched places with Manel Kape. Perez became Kape, and Kape became Perez. Back in April, Perez became the main event short-notice savior after Kape pulled out of a main event against Matheus Nicolau. With a shot at redemption, Perez went straight Andy Dufresne Shawshank on ‘em - fooked around and scored a first-round KO. The next morning, he woke up with his chonies in tatters and his balls the size of Barry Bonds’s head.   

This weekend, Alex Perez, looking like he has two Barry Bonds caught in a triangle choke, will roll up to the UFC Apex and double-park his giant balls in the red zone with Dana’s promise to pay any non-moving violations his balls should incur during his second straight headlining gig against Tatsuro Taira. I know what you're wondering? Where the fook does Ma$e fit into all this Diddy shit? Not that. Who the fook is Tatsuro Taira?  

Well, he’s one of the best up-and-coming fighters you haven’t heard of yet. I liken him to a more dangerous Muhammad Mokaev with better striking and ground and pound. This will essentially be a striker vs. grappler matchup. Although Perez came up in this game as a wrestler, he’ll have to go straight Michael Chandler and wrestler-strike his way to victory against Taira. Tatsuro Copperfield, they call him. Taira is a magician on the mat with a Vegas residency. This guy rolled up to Siegfried and Roy’s presidential suite and submitted the tiger that ate Sigfried’s ass. Or was it Roy’s ass? That’s neither here nor there, but Taira will try to duplicate Mokaev’s blueprint against Perez and get this fight to the mat where he can dominate top control. If the takedown well dries up over the course of five rounds, Taira has something for that culo on the feet, too. This is a crunchy little undercover banger.   

On the feet, Alex Perez is a firefighter like Stipe. He comes out of the pocket looking like Fire Marshall Bill: 

“Drop and roll! Your hand is on fire!” 

“So, it is. Well then, drop and roll is a good idea.” 

Alex Perez has been hit by lightning noineteen times. My man wades into the pocket behind short overhands and hooks and doesn’t come out until he looks like Freddy. Until Lady Gaga sends him back to the kitchen because there’s not enough pink in the middle. My man stays in the pocket like a gold digger. Matter of fact, hit that Kanye shit! Perez strafes around the cage while setting boobie traps to confine you against your will against the cage, where he can extend combinations at varying angles. Haha, he said boobie. When unleashing combinations, Perez changes arm angles mid-combination. He will follow twelve-to-six Lizzy Borden chopping overhands with Tiger uppercuts, then finish with hooks. Perez has deceptive hand speed, and varying arm angles makes it hard to cover up because it seems like he’s hitting you everywhere simultaneously.   

Perez will have the power advantage on the feet, but the key for him will be staying upright. Perez rocks an eighty-two percent takedown percentage but was taken down three times and gave up nearly a round of control time against Mokaev. But Perez did defend seventeen takedowns in that fight. His major malfunction is that Perez is an excellent wrestler but just a mediocre grappler. He’s a guillotine’s adolescent dream, rocking a Merton Hanks neck, aka that giraffe neck. Perez is 25-8 for his career, and of those eight L’s, five came via submission. And three of those five submission L’s came via guillotine choke. Perez will likely have to fight from his back early. But I think this will turn into a kickboxing match somewhere along the way and a battle of range - Taira's long straight punches vs. Perez's short round punches. 

On the mat, Tatsuro Taira grows on you like vines. Like that movie Ruins. Taira is Poison Ivy, the male version. He shoots a D-1 State Champ double leg, then turns you into a Life After People episode, overgrown and abandoned after you slowly deteriorate under his stifling top pressure. He erodes you like coastline from the top with unrelenting elbows and hammerfists.   

Position + Damage + Submissions = Grappling Holy Trinity. 

Taira is easily the most well-rounded ground specialist in the division – this ain’t your grandpappy’s typical lay-n-pray wrestler. He is so confident in his top control that he takes risks, knowing he can regain the position if he momentarily loses it while chipping away at you with the pickaxes he has for elbows. When he gets an opponent to the ground, it looks like a street fight when someone picks the guy with the cauliflower ears to fook with, and it quickly turns into a Chappelle’s Show When Keeping It Real Goes Wrong skit.   

But where Taira separates himself from typical ground specialists is on the feet. He can throw hands like Ninja Stars. Speed and length are a Deadly Combination like Big L and Pac, and Taira possesses both. His boxing is tight, like Lizzo sitting coach, complete with crispy straight punches that will beat Perez down the middle all night long. Taira's advantage will be at range, while Perez’s will be inside the pocket, making exchanges ugly. The lead left hook is Taira’s kryptonite on the feet. Edgar Chairez landed the lead hook against Taira consistently and even had Taira hurt briefly. Alex Perez will have left hooks for days if he can get inside on Taira.   

The numbers: Taira is 15-0 with four TKO/KOs and seven subs, and Perez is 25-8 with six TKO/KOs and seven subs. Perez will be the higher output striker, averaging just over four SLpM to Taira’s three and a half, and both fighters average two takedowns per fifteen minutes. Perez could end up in the top position, but Taira has crafty sweeps and slicker transitions than Perez. Taira is the (-200) favorite, and Perez is the familiar live-ass (+165) dog. If he can turn this into a firefight on the feet, he can KO Taira. Barring an early stoppage, this fight will turn into a kickboxing match eventually, which will be a 50/50 toss-up. Also, Perez is only weeks removed from a main event upset. Finishes are on deck for both fighters. The play for Taira is a submission, and the play for Perez is a TKO/KO. But there is also a ton of value in a decision either way. These guys can both survive in the other’s world. 

The main event winning streak didn’t. It ended before it could start at the hands of ol’ Athlete’s Foot-ass Jason Herzog last week when he prematurely waved off Jared Cannonier. I immediately sent his ass to the showers with no chanclas. Cannonier was hurt, but he wasn’t done. But the last thing Nassourdine Imavov should do is apologize for a dub. No, we never apologize for that. This week... man... I’m almost offended that I have to pick this one. Is Perez really back? How good is Tatsuro Taira? After dogs got out to a huge lead in main events early in the year, a dog hasn’t won since Perez beat Nicolau in April. So, who better than to get the streak started again? There’s just too much value on Perez as a dog, and at some point, I think this will turn into a kickboxing match, and Perez has fistfuls of Acme dynamite in his hands. Alex Perez via TKO, round four. On wax. 

Props 

Perez: TKO/KO (+400) Sub (+1000) Dec (+450)  

Taira: TKO/KO (+650) Sub (+130) Dec (+400) 

Winner: Alex Perez | Method: TKO Rd.4

Ikram Aliskerov (-1200) vs. Antonio Trocoli (+700)

Aliskerov: DK: $9.7k | Trocoli: DK: $6.5k

Ikram Aliskerov is the boogeyman. This guy has had four fights canceled within the last calendar year. Paulo Costa and Nassourdine Imavov are two fighters who dropped fights scheduled against Aliskerov. The line to fight Aliskerov is shorter than a Diddy meet and greet. His fights are canceled more than Southwest flights. Not that I blame anyone for getting cold feet about dancing with Aliskerov. I'd rather fly on a Boeing than fight this guy. I’d rather take my chances with a wing seat and turn into D.B. Cooper when the emergency door blows open mid-flight than fight Aliskerov. I’d rather take my chances at a Diddy par... Nah, never mind. I’d rather fight Aliskerov. Originally scheduled to fight Andre Muniz, Aliskerov now gets a late replacement debutante who hasn’t fought in nearly three years. Best believe I have my duck feather calligraphy pen dipped in ink and ready to do some medieval script writing off.   

Ikram Aliskerov looks like a sprained Islam Makhachev – swollen Makhachev. When I first saw Ikram fight, I thought he was a typical Russian wrestler, but he has some solid stand-up to go with his grappling. His punches are like trebuchets that he launches over your defenses like castle walls. His arms are so long he can donkey punch you while standing in front of you. Overall, his striking is like watching a chubby kid do backflips. You just don’t expect a guy like Askerov to be as athletic as he is; he’s oddly nimble with dangerous hybrid Karate/Thai kicks and flying knees that materialize out of nowhere. This will be only his third UFC appearance, but he is 15-1 in his career with six TKO/KOs and five subs. That lone loss was a KO at the hands of Khamzat Chimaev. 

This matchup will be like a G-Leaguer getting the call-up hours before the game and having to guard Kobe. Antonio Trocoli is 12-3 with three TKO/KOs and five subs. That’s it. That’s all I got. “Hey, you just read his stats; I could’ve done that.” Okay, okay. Homie is built like the Space Needle and looks like a Fabricio Werdum MTV Spring Break love child. He wears a reflective hat on top of his head so planes don’t fly into him. This guy hasn’t fought since 2021 and only has one fight since 2019. This MF is basically coming out of retirement to fight a guy who has been stacking bodies like Pringles. Homie must have a Charles Bronson Death Wish. Overall, Trocoli is more of a Jiu-Jitsu specialist, but he is long and could cause fighters problems on their feet in the future. By future, I mean beyond Saturday night.  

Aliskerov is the (-900) favorite, and Trocoli is the (+575) mangy-ass dog. Honestly, I thought Aliskerov would be closer to a (-2000). Trocoli isn’t a TLC scrub, but he hasn’t fought in years and will be severely overmatched against Aliskerov. The only question is, can Aliskerov finish Trocoli in the first round and justify his massive Fantasy salary cap hit? I don’t see this fight going close to the distance, but Trocoli was supposed to debut a couple weeks ago against Oumar Sy before the fight was canceled, so he should be in fight shape. That should count for at least a round against Aliskerov. Ikram Aliskerov via TKO, round two. Put that ish on wax.   

Props 

Aliskerov: TKO/KO (-135) Sub (+165) Dec (+800)  

Trocoli: TKO/KO (+2200) Sub (+2200) Dec (+1600) 

Winner: Ikram Aliskerov | Method: TKO Rd.2

Timothy Cuamba (-200) vs. Lucas Almeida (+165)

Cuamba: DK: $8.8k | Almeida: DK:$7.4k

Me looking at this fight: “What are you doing here?” 

This fight: “Who, me? Oh nothing. Just hanging around.” 

Recently, Lucas Almeida has been taking L’s like the Titanic taking on water. And Timothy Cuamba lost his debut in February to Joaquin Buckley’s left pec muscle. Cuamba fought Bolaji Oki, who was built like how they built Mt. Rushmore, using TNT to blast away rock and sediment to carve him. So Cuamba losing to Oki is understandable like Christopher Reeves skipping leg day. That fight looked like a Pom-Pom tussling with a Doberman at the dog park. To Cuamba’s credit, he fought up a weight class at 155, but that fight looked like your first title shot against your Pops for the man of the house. Pops TKO, round one. But all that is old shit, and we’re in the business of slangin’ new shit. This should be a solid kickboxing match as long as nobody fooks with the thermostat and causes the AC to take down Almeida, where he is nothing more than a chalk outline from his back. 

“Ay!” Cuamba looks like a Kumate Alex Rodriguez and comes equipped with an A-Rod right hand across the diamond from the 5.5 hole when he used to play shortstop. My first overall impression of Cuamba is that he’s kind of a square like dweebs in the 50s. His striking is technical with no glaring holes, but he’s a little too boxy. It has too many jagged edges. Cuamba’s style is a little too programmed and not enough flow state. In this game, it’s Blood In, Blood Out, and life’s a risk, carnal. In his debut against Oki, Cuamba wasn’t willing to risk losing to win. He played it safe, and as a result, he looked very average to me. 

The biggest problem Cuamba will have against Lucas Almeida will be defending the jab. Cuamba got his face peeled like a tatter by Oki’s jab. He got his face jabbed... off. He got Sean Archer’d by Oki’s jab. The real frazzledriiiiiii... Never mind. I am not a danger to myself. I love my life. I’m just saying homie didn’t slip or even attempt to slip a single jab. He looked like he was wearing a pair of bifocals and trying to get a closer look at Oki’s knuckles. He looked like Grammy trying to read a text every time Oki threw a jab. The key for Cuamba will be committing to combinations and setting up some level changes. I don’t know if this kid can wrestle/grapple or not, but freshman P.E. wrestling in high school should be enough experience to take down Almeida. Timmy is 8-2 with four TKO/KOs, and he landed only thirty-three significant strikes and averaged two and a half SLpM in his debut against Oki. I throw more than thirty-three strikes when I walk into a spiderweb.   

You already know Lucas Almeida has that Mario Cart banana peel takedown defense, rocking a forty percent success rate in defending takedowns. But you may have forgotten he is a solid kickboxer. That’s because Almeida couldn’t buy a dub right meow if he was the Bank of England – if he could print a dub like the Federal Reserve (which is neither, btw). The Travelocity gnome, Pat Sabatini, cracked his ass like single-ply two fights ago. That fight looked like a Leprechaun Saga installment. Homie got mounted and beat the fook up by a Chucky doll. Then he got brutally TKO’d by the Kelly Slater of MMA, the beach person down on his luck (or bum if you want to be a Richard about it), Andre Fili. But that was 2023 shit, and it’s a new year for Almeida. This matchup is a grooved 3-0 fastball right in his wheelhouse – a decent striker with limited wrestling. 

Almeida’s M.O. on the feet is attacking the body. He’s good at changing levels with his strikes from body to head and vice versa. He fought Daniel Zellhuber tough on the Contender Series and KO’d the Ultimate Fighter Champ, Michael Tizano, in his debut. He has short, straight punches and averages over five SLpM because he commits to combinations. But I gotta say, Almeida looked terrible against Andre Fili. Almeida has a handprint tattoo on his chest and left with Fili’s footprint tatted on his ass. Under fire, Almeida looked scared to engage and raised up on his tiptoes like Riff Raff in a jewelry store with his chin high in the air during every exchange. He looked like Wilson peeking over the fence. And Fili eventually made him pay. 

Almeida is 14-3 with noine TKO/KOs and five subs. But the most important numbers: Almeida will be the (+155) live dog, and Cuamba will be the (-185) favorite. Fantasy-wise, Almeida is the finishing threat and has the bigger upside. Cuamba can win this fight but likely won’t put up impressive numbers in route to a decision. I didn’t see any Super NES Killer Instinct in Cuamba during his debut. I see him scoring a takedown here and there and crossing his fingers when they read the judges’s scorecards. Almeida will pressure Cuamba and let his hands go. BUT (big but), I can’t trust Almeida after how he looked against Fili. Timothy Cuamba via decision. On wax.   

 Props 

Cuamba: TKO/KO (+165) Sub (+700) Dec (+250)  

Almeida: TKO/KO (+350) Sub (+1100) Dec (+600) 

Winner: Timothy Cuamba | Method: Decision

Douglas Andrade (+105) vs. Miles Johns (-125)

Andrade: DK: $8.2k | Johns: DK: $8k

Tuco Salamanca is back. Douglas Silva De Andrade is a Snow White sleeper. The names in his loss column read like a death row roll call, and I ain’t talking Suge Knight. I’m talking the Green Mile with an electric chair sitting at the end of it. This guy has quietly been fighting in the UFC for a decade and even has a win over Chito Vera while sharing the Octagon with the likes of Petr Yan, Rob Font, Said Nurmagomedov, Lerone Murphy, and former Bantamweight Champ Renan Barao. My man’s experience is a Madden 97 and should give him a massive advantage against a man with two plural names, Miles Johns. This will be power vs. power on the feet and should be one of the better fights on the main card.  Douglas Silva De Andrade is track six on Chronic 2001. His shit’s the bomb, explosive. Over-dosage, imperial pistols ferocious, fook a Miles Johns, and a mile of Johns piled a mile long. Tuco will shit in all of them with no courtesy flush. You can’t stop crazy. Tuco walks around wearing an oxygen mask connected to tanks filled with smoke. My man was in grade school, huffing on an inhaler filled with smoke. This muhf**ker wants all the smoke like Patty and Selma. Tuco is underrated AF and will call every play in his playbook during a fight. He’ll throw spinning wheel kicks to the calves, and there isn’t a strike that he can’t add a flying element to. His best weapons are AYSO toe punts to the large intestines that will have you clinching cheeks like Crohn's disease. Andrade’s style is random; he strings together random combinations that seem like they shouldn’t fit together. His striking literally looks like someone is controlling him with a PS5 controller and going around the horn, pressing all the buttons. Spinning shit, flying shit, wild shit – Andrade leaves the Octagon looking like Johnny Depp’s comforter. 

Tuco is 29-5 with twenty TKO/KOs and five subs. That’s a fookin’ stat line. And he averages just over three and a half SLpM to Johns’ just under three and a half. Andrade isn’t a high-output striker; he’s an explosive power striker and the bigger finishing threat in this matchup. The key for Tuco will be pressuring Johns, who tends to fade midway through fights. 

Miles Johns is built like Megan Fox’s thumb. Straight out The Shire, a crazy muhf**ker named Miles. Miles Johns is thirty years old and still measures his height on a wall with a pencil. He’s hoping to ride Splash Mountain this year. But all that aside, someone better make sure the pilot light under Miles Johns’ ass is lit, or Tuco will bury him in the desert. Johns won Dancing with the Stars doing that ol’ half-step. Johns is known for eking out fights by the skin of his ass because he fades like Great Clips after getting out to fast starts. Miles has freakishly long arms for his body, and his style is that of a lunchroom brawler. He throws technique out the sunroof and swings from his ankle wraps. His name is Miles Johns because his punches are a mile long, and he swings out his long Johns. But overall, Johns is a stiff striker who likes to steal close rounds with timely takedowns.   

Miles is 14-2 with four TKO/KOs and two subs. The biggest knock against Johns is that he isn’t much of a finisher. He hasn’t finished a fight since 2021. And the only guys in the UFC to finish Andrade are Petr Yan and Rob Font. His career high in strikes landed is eighty, but his second-highest performance was forty-eight in a fight that went to the third round. Miles is a Fantasy bust waiting to happen. But somehow, Johns is the slightest (-115) favorite, and Tuco is the negative money (-105) live-ass dog. Tuco is the finishing threat and has a far higher Fantasy upside than Johns. Matter of fact, I’m done gum-bumping. Douglas Silva De Andrade via TKO, round three. Put that ish on wax.   

Props 

Tuco: TKO/KO (+300) Sub (+1200) Dec (+330)   

Johns: TKO/KO (+500) Sub (+1400) Dec (+140) 

Winner: Douglas Silva De Andrade | Method: TKO Rd.3

Asu Almabaev (-600) vs. Jose Johnson (+425)

Almabaev: DK: $9.5k | Johnson: DK:$6.7k

This one is a crunchy little groove. Asu Almabaev is an Umar from another mother. He’s everything you expect someone with a last name like that to be. He’s a one-man horde. In a previous life, Almabaev was Genghis Khan’s champion to settle military disputes. People rode this muhf**ker into battle. He’s a warhorse; he’s got that thoroughbred in him like Mr. Hands. But “No Way” Jose Johnson ain’t stepping into the cage to bend no fookin’ knee. Jose’s style has some funk on it like your Grammy’s toes, and at the very least, he will be a good test and force Almabaev to dig deep in his skill set to win this one.    

Almabaev is special on the mat. When he gets his hands locked behind you, it’s like they’re welded together. You need bolt cutters to get this guy off you. His top control is solitary confinement, and in between rounds, you get conjugal visits. He moves like a lava lamp on the mat; he’s fluid, a liquid state that flows between positions. Most importantly, Almabaev is a chain wrestler. He throws takedowns combos like hand combos. Front headlock to a single-leg to a double-leg to a body lock... and it don’t stop. Plans within plans. Like the Bene Geserit, he knows what he’s going to do twenty seconds before he does it. In two UFC bouts, Almabaev averages over seven takedowns per fifteen minutes and landed noine in his most recent bout against C.J. Vergara. 

Almabaev’s major malfunction: He was dipped in the River Styx and held by his hands. His hands are his weakness. His striking is shakier than Michael J. Fox playing Operation. He needs to complete some missions to add some hitpoints to his striking. Asu is far from a chump on the feet; he has tight, technical boxing but lacks high-level footwork and combinations. He makes up for a lack of fluidity by over-punching and trying to take your head off. Almabaev can hang with Johnson on the feet, but his path to victory is on the mat where he has noine career submissions. His overall record is 19-2, with three TKO/KOs to go along with his subs.   

Jose Johnson, aka Silky John-Stone!, aka Silk da Shocker, better get some Neosporin for that burn. My man is about to acquire third-degree mat burns. At the end of this one, they will have to graft skin from his ass to his back. His back is going to look like Meek Mill’s knees after this one. Zing! He’s going to look like Ace Ventura crawling out of the rhino’s ass by the end of this one. Jose Johnson reminds me of a near-death-experience Neal Magny, who has a new lease on life. He’s like prime Neal Magny when Neal had some fire in his belly, and I ain’t talking the bubble guts. Jose is a desperado on the feet, slangin’ heat from the hips. He finishes every combination with his hands at his waist, daring you to have the audacity to punch him in the face. Blocking punches is a sign of weakness to Jose. Jose also tends to reach for punches, which will get him taken down against Asu.   

Don’t get me wrong, Jose isn’t a prude on the mat; he’ll at least fake it, pretend he’s trying to get up or sweep. He’s got the spirit of a young Tony from his back, creating damage from the bottom with elbows. Overall, Jose has a fun style and will try to make this a scrap in every position, even if he has to fight from his back for significant stretches. He’s 16-8 for his career with eight TKO/KOs and three subs and averages... well, does it really matter how many SLpM he averages? Just under three SLpM. But that’s not the best part. Chad Anheliger took Jose down four times. Who? That’s bad news going into a fight against a guy like Almabaev.   

Almabaev is the (-500) favorite, and Johnson is the (+375) Santa’s Little Helper at the Springfield Downs. It will have to get ugly before it can get pretty for Jose. He’ll have a shot if he can get this fight to the third round. It’s hard for anybody to wrestle for three straight rounds. But this definitely has the feel of a build-up fight for Almabaev. Will Almabaev be worth the Fantasy price tag? I always shy away from first-round finishes. But half of Jose’s eight career L’s came by submission. But-but, Almabaev couldn’t finish Vergara, and I think Jose is a better grappler than Vergara. I like playing Almabaev for a decision. So... What are you doing? Put that ish on wax! Asu Almabaev via decision.   

Props 

Almabaev: TKO/KO (+600) Sub (-110) Dec (+200)   

Johnson: TKO/KO (+900) Sub (+2500) Dec (+1000) 

Winner: Asu Almabaev | Method: Decision

Prelims

$7k Value Menu

Adam Fugitt ($7.9k): This dude is long, lanky, and stanky. Stankonia is on ya when Adam Fugittaboutit gets hold of you. He’s 1-2 in the UFC, but he faced the heathen, Michael Morales, on short notice and hung around into the third round, and faced Mike Malott, who is highly touted. Fugitt is a Michael Vick FC dog with long, rangy striking, and an old school Matt Lindland, aka Pepe Le Pew style on the mat. He’s a grinder who makes fights ugly once he closes the distance. Fugitt will be facing the human pincushion, the walking voodoo doll, Josh Quinlan, who is coming in off back-to-back ass crackings in which Quinlan absorbed over two hundred significant strikes between the two bouts. Even as a slight favorite, Quinlan shouldn’t be favored over anybody on the roster. If Fugitt can get this fight to the mat, Fugittaboutit. Fugitt is the higher output striker, averaging nearly four and a half SLpM and three and a half takedowns per fifteen minutes. Also, Fugitt has finished eight of his noine career dubs with five TKO/KOs and three subs.   

Alex Perez ($7.6k): He’s tough to take down and can survive on his back if he is taken down. Perez showed he could defend high-level takedowns and get back to his feet against Mokaev, and although I think Taira is better than Mokaev, I think Perez will eventually keep the fight standing and turn this into a firefight on the feet. Taira has tight, technical striking, but Perez can make this ugly on the feet within the pocket. If Perez can avoid the early submission (he is prone to getting choked), this fight will favor him as the fight progresses into the latter rounds. If this were a three-round scrap, I might favor Taira, but the championship rounds will be Perez’s time to shine. Also, this is Taira’s first real test, whereas Perez has fought for a title and shared the Octagon with two world champions.   

Lucas Almeida ($7.4k): At some point, Lucas Almeida has to put his foot down and decide he’s not going to get his ass cracked anymore. I have no idea if Timothy Cuamba can wrestle/grapple, but if Almeida can keep this standing, he can be a flipper. His Fantasy upside is a TKO/KO finish against a kid whose style is like dying in my sleep; I don’t feel it. Cuamba looked very average in his debut, and this matchup for Lucas is a belt-high two-seamer with a 3-0 count. If my man can’t get this dub, it might be time to go full House of Pain and pack it up, pack it in. Almeida averages five SLpM, and Cuamba only landed thirty-three in his debut, which played out almost entirely on the feet. That bodes well for Almeida, who can overwhelm the young scrapper with volume.   

  $6k Bathroom Clearance Rack 

Jimmy Flick ($6.8k): The clearance rack isn’t looking very appetizing this week. It’s a Motley Crue if I’ve ever seen one. Jimmy Flick might have a chance to pull off an upset against Nate Maness. Both fighters are wrestlers/grapplers, and Jimmy Flick is a submission specialist. He has seventeen career dubs, and fifteen of them came by submission. He can sub you from the top or the bottom, and there’s a good chance Maness might opt to relocate the fight to the mat, lest he be the one defending takedowns. If this fight stays standing, Maness will have a massive stand-up advantage. It’s not that Maness is an elite striker; it’s just that Flick is an elite non-striker. Jimmy has to get this fight to the mat, whether it's the top or bottom position, and if Maness gets caught slipping, Flick has excellent triangle chokes. Flick will have to win this fight by submission.   

Twenty-Twen-Twen Sleepers

Shayilan (+155): Shayilan vs. Mel Costa is the Steve Garcia Sloppy Seconds Bowl. Both fighters have crossed-out Steve Garcia tats on their arms. Shayilan is a power wrestler striker with an explosive right hand. Mel Costa will have slicker striking, but Shayilan can change the fight with a single right hand. Shayilan can also get it to the mat if shit gets hairy on the feet. Both fighters have terrible takedown defense but average around two and a half takedowns per fifteen minutes. This could come down to who shoots first. Mel Costa has lost two of his first three UFC bouts, and Shayilan is 3-1 in his last four. Costa’s style doesn’t scare me in this matchup, and Shayilan’s superior physical attributes could be the difference.   

Joshua Van (+190): They use Joshua Van’s hands to mine lithium. They use his hands to drill for oil. Van has There Will Be Blood hands. This guy is the UFC Rodtang without the kicks. It sounds like plump kids at the Y doing cannonballs off the high dive when Van lands. Of course, that won’t matter if he can’t stay upright against Tagir Ulanbekov. But Van has a seventy-eight percent takedown defense and averages noine SLpM. If he can drag Tagir into deep waters, I love his chances on the feet to change the tide of the fight with one punch. Also, Van attacks the body well, which will wear down Ulanbekov, who showed he can be broken in his loss to Tim Elliott. Also, Van was originally scheduled to face Taira before Taira got moved to the main event, so Van has had a full camp preparing for an elite grappler.   

Alex Perez (+155): He was the last dog to win a main event, and right now, Perez has a ton of momentum after nearly beating Mokaev and duffing out Matheus Nicolau in a main event just a few weeks ago. Taira is built for a fight, but Perez can make it a fookin’ scrap. Taira has slick striking, but he is defensively vulnerable, especially in the pocket where Perez does his best work. Perez has deceptively quick hands and commits to combinations - punches in bunches while changing levels with his hands. If Perez can defend a couple of takedowns, this will likely settle into a kickboxing match, and that will slightly favor Perez’s power and ability to wreak havoc within close range.   

Pick ‘Em 

Josh Quinlan (-125) vs. Adam Fugitt (+105) 

Winner: Adam Fugitt 

Method: TKO Rd.3 

Tagir Ulanbekov (-230) vs. Joshua Van (+190) 

Winner: Joshua Van 

Method: Decision 

Jimmy Flick (+375) vs. Nate Maness (-500) 

Winner: Nate Maness 

Method: Decision 

Brady Hiestand (+155) vs. Garrett Armfield (-185) 

Winner: Garrett Armfield 

Method: Decision 

Carli Judice (+130) vs. Gabriella Fernandes (-160) 

Winner: Gabriella Fernandes 

Method: Decision 

Jeka Saragih(-350) vs. Westin Wilson (+275) 

Winner: Jeka Saragih 

Method: TKO Rd.2 

Josefine Knuttsson (-225) vs. Julia Polastri (+185) 

Winner: Julia Polastri 

Method: Decision 

Mel Costa (-185) vs. Shayilan (+155) 

Winner: Shayilan 

Method: Decision 

Thanks for reading LineStar Weekly Knockout! We'll be back next Thursday with another one. Until then, good luck and support your local MMA Gym.

About Me

My name is Chris Guy, and I’m an avid combat sports enthusiast and practitioner. I’ve been a fan of MMA since the early 2000s when Limewire was still around, and I downloaded Bas Rutten’s Big Book of Combat. In 2004, I started training Muay Thai at City Boxing in San Diego, CA. I competed as an amateur for many years, and I've also dabbled in Jiu-Jitsu. I follow many different disciplines, such as Combat Ji-Jitsu, Muay Thai, Glory Kickboxing, Boxing, and MMA.

I’m equally as enthusiastic about the craft of writing, and in addition to writing about combat sports, I also write short fiction and music. I hope to bring unique prose to sports writing, and along the way, encourage people to not only become Martial Arts fans but to also become Martial Artists themselves.

In the future, you may see me refer to the Thunderdome; it's an ode to the old Mad Max movie and refers to the world-class training facility I built in my one-car garage. It's complete with throw dummies, wrestling mats, heavy bags, and six months' worth of Chef Boyardee cans from when I thought the world was going to end back in March. I hope you enjoy my work, and if you don’t, the Thunderdome has an open door polic1